Sometimes I get up from my bedroom to go to the living room for something and by the time I get there, I stand there and wonder why I went in there.
That said, I can remember some things as far back as 73 years ago. I remember everything I am sorry for doing through the decades. The more recent the time frame, the less I remember.
It seems that I remember things that had an impact in my life. Maybe that is normal, I don’t know. I believe everything I do every day has some impact in my life and everything I do today leads to what happens tomorrow and beyond. Maybe that’s why I have a difficult time deciding on what to do, I tend to overthink things. I wasn’t like this before Joyce passed away. She was my guiding light. She was my lighthouse that kept me from running my ship aground in the darkness. Now I am a rudderless ship on an open sea with no land in sight. I know now that I was never meant to live alone and yet I do.
The Lord has me stuck here on this earthly plane of existence. Why, I do not know. There must be a reason why I am here and so many better men and women have passed away during my lifetime, never reaching my age. The Lord works in ways I do not understand. He has saved my life several times. I suppose I will never understand in this life. I wonder if I will know why, after He finally takes me away?
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