220323 Sentinel, The Last Time

I read the sentence about (The Last Time) long ago and filed it away until now.

The saying goes, you never know when it is the last time to kiss your lover, to make love with your partner, to tell someone that you love them. I took that with a grain of salt at the time, now I know the meaning of that simple sentence.

I remember sitting on the back porch, watching the sunset together. Rising in the early morning hours sipping hot coffee on the front porch with the one I loved. Sitting together on New Year’s Eve drinking Champagne and thinking how wonderful our lives were. Seeing my infant daughter and her infant daughter and holding them both when they were just minutes old. I remember seeing good friends for the last time at farewell parties. I remember our legendary Christmas party we hosted in our first and only new home with a crowd of friends and family that was standing room only. Joyce had spent days preparing for it. It was the best party of our lives together. Our beautiful living room with its vaulted ceiling that after getting the biggest Christmas tree we could find, looked like a peanut in relation to that vaulted ceiling. The fireplace crackled through the night with guests enjoying being beside the fireplace. I remember my last day in the navy, receiving my honorable discharge and driving out the gate at North Island Naval Air Station on Coronado. I drove home, walked in the door of our apartment and told Joyce, “They actually let me go.” I remember the last time I said goodbye to my father. I didn’t know that would be the last time I would ever see him. The same thing happened with my grandfather. I remember the last time I saw both of my uncles whom I idolized. I didn’t know that would be the last time I ever saw them. I remember the last time I ever saw my mother. I didn’t know it was the last time I said goodbye to her. I remember the last night Joyce was alive. She didn’t know I was there because she never regained consciousness. I kept touching her arm into the night as it slowly got colder as her heart slowed down as the night progressed. I kissed her cold forehead as Annie and I left for a few hours of sleep before planning to return the next morning. I received a call at 5:15, Joyce had passed away. The nurses kept her in her room so I could get there to say my last goodbye.

I hope this piece I write today will encourage you to be kind and loving to those close to you. Never part without telling them how much you love them. I hope you will appreciate every moment with them, because you never know if that is the last time you will ever see them. One last thing, never go to sleep at night without mending something you may have argued over. That loved one may not wake up the next morning and you’ll never have a chance to mend your fences. Even if you know you were on the right side of the argument, be the better person and settle the dispute in a kind way. You may be glad that you did.