211127 Sentinel, Joyce's Birthday

Today would have been Joyce’s 76th birthday.

The most charming, most practical, best cook, best mother, best grandmother, best woman to spend a lifetime with was one Joyce whom I married a lifetime ago. No one I ever met was more kind, more thoughtful, more forgiving up to a point. Once a person threatened or hurt her family, cross a line through his/her name because they were history best forgotten. They were no longer welcome, ever!

I know of three wonderful women who were born on this day. The first and most dear was my Joyce, God rest her soul. The second is Deanna, a woman I worked with at Litton. She has a delightful laugh and has made her husband Martin a happy man and she was fun to work with. The third is or perhaps was also named Joyce. She was married to another sailor in my squadron named Bo. She was a perky blond who played the dumb blond role to perfection despite the fact she was very bright. She and Bo were so much fun to be around and party with.

Birthdays were very important to my mother and there were always celebrations for those birthdays. Mom always told all of her children that they were wonderful, either beautiful or handsome and had great worth in this world.

Joyce’s family was different. They never made a big fuss over birthdays and I don’t know the reason why they were not celebrated. This past year I learned a lot about Joyce, more than any other time. Perhaps she wanted to share more, knowing she was not going to be around much longer. One thing that shocked me to my core was that she was never told by any family member how pretty she was. I found that astounding! Her mother told Joyce her sister was pretty, but never said that to Joyce. Everyone else knew Joyce was beautiful.

This picture was perhaps 20 years ago. Joyce was cominig home after work after she had a fresh hair do done at a local beauty shop. I thought she looked great.

This was Joyce's senior picture. I had this with me all through my navy days. I was in boot camp and had it inside my locker. A fellow boot camp sailor saw it and asked me if that was my girl friend. I answed yes it was. His reply was quick, "With a girl like that, what the F**k are you doing here then?" I had no good responce and I began to wonder that myself.

This one was 1964 and I think it says that Joyce was indeed a beautiful woman.

This picture was before my time with Joyce. I think this was her pre girl scout uniform.

I like this picture. It was Joyce's mother, grandma Mickey holding Joyce. I see how much Joyce and her mother resembled each other. In Joyce's last few years the resemblence was even more dramatic.

I love this picture. I was home on leave and we were having a boat ride in grandpa's fishing boat. I think it shows a happy couple and Joyce as gorgous as ever.

This was Joyce in 1966 when I bought my first new car. It was taken outside our apartment on Waco street in San Diego. If there was ever a woman this beautiful, I have yet to see her. Hollywood starlets had nothing on this woman who was never told she was even pretty, much less beautiful. Rest in peace my love.

Joyce was also a wonderful keeper of secrets. Everyone shared their secrets with Joyce and she never ever told anyone else. One case in particular was with my mother. Mom was in the hospital and she knew she was dying. She even predicted the day she would die exactly one week ahead of the time. We were still working and living 80 miles away from the hospital so we were in the hospital on Sunday with mom, five days before she passed. As we were saying goodbye and saying we would be back the following weekend, mom asked Joyce to come close so she could whisper something to her. Joyce put her ear close to mom and mom told her something and told Joyce to never repeat it to anyone. I asked Joyce on the way home and she would not say what it was. That was 2005 and I had asked Joyce many times since what mom said. This last summer in August I asked Joyce again what mom said and she still declined telling me what it was. Joyce took it to her grave and never told anyone. I think I know what mom probably said, but I will never know now.