Thursday, February 21, 2019

Uncle Billy at the bank 190221


      It happened that uncle Billy had another misunderstanding again.

      Uncle Billy went to the bank to get a money order so he could pay a bill. The new cashier said, "that will be five dollars for the money order." Uncle Billy said, "that's robbery." The cashier thought he said this is a robbery. She hit the panic button and there just happened to be a police car at the doughnut shop across the street. The officers dropped their doughnuts and ran across the street and into the bank quick as a wink. Uncle Billy was thrown to the deck and handcuffed. They took him to the local police station and questioned him until the FBI got there and they too queried him for a long time.
      Aunt Ethyl, uncle Billy's wife, was concerned when he did not return for such a long time and that's when I got the phone call. She was upset and worried about him. I asked if it was possible he stopped to pick up some beer? She said, "I don't think so, there are three cases of beer in the pantry." I said okay I'll go looking for him. I got in my car and started cruising along the byway from his farm toward the bank. That's when I got another call, this time from uncle Billy. "Hey can you pick me up?"
      "Only if you tell me where you are," I replied.
      "I'm at the police station."
      "What happened this time uncle Billy?"
      "Long story, just get me outa here."
      "I'm on my way."
      I picked uncle Billy up, called his wife and returned him to his truck." She asked, "could I stay for dinner?"
      "Why sure" I replied. By then it was getting late in the day.
      We arrived and his wife had a platter overflowing with pork chops and enough gravy to float a fishing boat for the chops and the mashed potatoes. "Do you have any vegetables aunt Ethyl?"
      "Ah, Billy don't eat them."
      I had a chop and potatoes slathered with aunt Ethyl's gravy, really good gravy. I finally had time to ask uncle Billy how he got all bloody and swollen? He answered, "them cops throwed me ta the deck and darn near busted ma head wide open when they was a think'in I was a robb'in that bank. They was say'in they was sorry, but them was the procedures they goes by when they's a robb'in a goin on."
      One last question before I left, "uncle Billy why do you have three cases of beer in the pantry?"
       His answer, "well, ya never does know when a thirsty guest be a stop'in in."

Copyright Bill Weber 2019 and beyond.

No comments:

Post a Comment