This post may be somewhat gross for some delicate souls, but it is the truth of what we went through on long flights over the Pacific. I still find the humor in it, but that is just me.
We were in a plane just like this one many years ago tracking a Pacific typhoon. We danced around the edge of the storm for hours. The outside edge is the worst place too be because the turbulence is the worst there. We had a full compliment of crew members on board because we did not know where we would end up landing and we had to have engine mechanics, hydraulics and air frame guys on board in case we needed repairmen. There were 30 men in all, about 10-12 more than on a radar coverage mission for the 7th fleet off the coast of Vietnam. Those guys that normally just went along for the ride to wherever we were deploying to were not used to chasing typhoons and being in rough turbulence for hours at a time. They were the first to begin vomiting. The stench of their vomit filled the plane and that triggered the regular guys puking. We were up to 28 people spilling their guts and that left just Cal and I as the only ones still well. We were doing all right until one of the guys was stumbling past Cal and retched right beside him. That was it for Cal and he soon followed. I was, by some miracle, the only one that never gave up my lunch that day. I suppose that is not something one would get a trophy for, but I am good with the accomplishment.
As I write this I remembered another time, similar situation, when Tommy Fincannon (the crew comedian) had an idea for a prank. The turbulence got rough and he went to the galley and got a can of soup took a barf bag and put all of the soup he couldn't put in his mouth in the bag. He then went down the aisle through the plane looking for someone getting green around the gills. He found his target, pulled the bag up to his mouth and faked his vomiting into the bag. He then looked into the bag and said, "gee that still looks good," stuck his hand into the bag and scooped up a hand full and stuck it into his mouth. Of course that had the desired effect on his target.
We would be out on our missions for hours at a time, so everyone would do some preparation before the flight. More specifically empty one's bowels. The plane configuration had one long passageway from the cockpit to the tail section. At the tail was a restroom. It had a funnel with a tube that went out of the plane for urination and a 5 gallon steel container with a toilet seat on top for a necessary deification. But there was no ventilation there so everyone tried not to use it if possible. The restroom had just a small curtain to pull to close. It went from the top bulkhead to about 3 inches from the floor. At that time Tommy, Cal and I were the lower ranks so we were the ones to go to the galley to get all the food and coffee for those flights and when the flight was over we got to drive over to the dump with all the trash and that 5 gallon bucket if it had been used. We had, for a short time, one officer in the crew that would consistently go take a dump in the bucket in less than 20 minutes after takeoff. Tommy came up with a solution to that problem. He had an extra pair of flight boots that he brought aboard and as soon as we secured from takeoff stations he took his extra pair of flight boots and put them in the restroom and closed the curtain with the toes of the boots visible under the curtain. That officer headed back to dump in there every 15 minutes and the boots were always there so he would turn around and go back to his station. We in the back knew what was going on so we were not affected. The prank seemed to cure the problem after that.
As I write this I remembered another time, similar situation, when Tommy Fincannon (the crew comedian) had an idea for a prank. The turbulence got rough and he went to the galley and got a can of soup took a barf bag and put all of the soup he couldn't put in his mouth in the bag. He then went down the aisle through the plane looking for someone getting green around the gills. He found his target, pulled the bag up to his mouth and faked his vomiting into the bag. He then looked into the bag and said, "gee that still looks good," stuck his hand into the bag and scooped up a hand full and stuck it into his mouth. Of course that had the desired effect on his target.
We would be out on our missions for hours at a time, so everyone would do some preparation before the flight. More specifically empty one's bowels. The plane configuration had one long passageway from the cockpit to the tail section. At the tail was a restroom. It had a funnel with a tube that went out of the plane for urination and a 5 gallon steel container with a toilet seat on top for a necessary deification. But there was no ventilation there so everyone tried not to use it if possible. The restroom had just a small curtain to pull to close. It went from the top bulkhead to about 3 inches from the floor. At that time Tommy, Cal and I were the lower ranks so we were the ones to go to the galley to get all the food and coffee for those flights and when the flight was over we got to drive over to the dump with all the trash and that 5 gallon bucket if it had been used. We had, for a short time, one officer in the crew that would consistently go take a dump in the bucket in less than 20 minutes after takeoff. Tommy came up with a solution to that problem. He had an extra pair of flight boots that he brought aboard and as soon as we secured from takeoff stations he took his extra pair of flight boots and put them in the restroom and closed the curtain with the toes of the boots visible under the curtain. That officer headed back to dump in there every 15 minutes and the boots were always there so he would turn around and go back to his station. We in the back knew what was going on so we were not affected. The prank seemed to cure the problem after that.
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