Sunday, December 2, 2018

The Misadventures of Uncle Billy #3



      One warm June day uncle Billy decided to trim off a long heavy tree branch that was getting close to his farm house. He started up his chain saw, made sure all was ready and started up his ladder to cut that long branch. The branch was over 18 feet long, so it was quite heavy. Uncle Billy was up on his ladder about 16 feet from the ground, the ladder was from ground level to branch at about a 30 degree angle when he started cutting. He knew enough to cut a small wedge below the limb so the final cut was nice and clean. The chainsaw blades were nice and sharp and the saw was ripping through quite well so uncle Billy was feeling good about the operation, that is until the branch snapped as the saw went through. What he didn't consider was the reaction of the part of the limb still attached to the tree. When the heavy limb was gone it took a couple hundred pounds off the part still attached to the tree. The part still on the tree whipped straight up and due to the angle of his ladder it flipped the ladder backwards. Uncle Billy could see the limb go up higher than his head as he rocked backwards about two feet away from the limb. He told me he thought the only thing that saved him and the ladder from going backwards to the ground was the danged heavy chainsaw doing a counterbalance for him and then he said it was lucky he didn't cut his fool leg off because his hand and trigger finger was holding on tight to that saw because if he dropped it he would have to get a new chain for his saw.
      Now you might think that uncle Billy learned a lesson after that experience and he did somewhat. The next time he had another big limb going out very near his barn. So he got out the ladder, climbed up to the limb and decided to cut less off that time so this one wouldn't flip the ladder back like before. He also decided to loop his left arm through the ladder and over the top of the branch in case the limb snapped back. He had the chainsaw running and used his right arm to hold the saw while he cut through the limb. The branch dropped and that allowed the remaining part to rise just enough to pinch and hold his left arm between the remaining limb and the rung on the ladder. There he was, one arm locked between the ladder and the tree branch and the other with the chainsaw in hand. It was quite a predicament. He hung there for a few minutes until his arm started to tingle from lack of circulation. He didn't want to drop the saw, but he didn't want his wife to come out and see him trapped up in a tree either. He finally determined that if he put his right arm over the end of the branch and used the weight of the saw and his body to push the end of the limb back down he could slip his arm out of the nasty trap he created. It was just barely enough to free his left arm with some bruises and some raw flesh from his armpit to his wrist. From then on uncle Billy did all his chainsawing from ground level.
      
      Copyright Bill Weber 2018 and beyond.

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